Just a Stay at Home Mom

Something really torked me off this week. I was reading someone's Facebook status about "choosing to work and not be a stay at home mom" and how SAHM's were badgering her about working instead of staying home. And there were several comments that, of course, supported this person's feelings about working instead of being home. One, though, that really ticked me off was that one person insinuated the boredom that she would have if she were a SAHM! Say what?!?!?!

That girl has got to be out of her mind if she thinks SAHMs are BORED!!!! Luckily, this person's FB status is not open to the public to comment on, or I would've given all those moms a comment full. Because I have an opinion on the matter.

Stay at home moms are not bored. If anything, it's quite the opposite. We long for moments of personal reflection, time to pee ALONE, a shower without interruption, a trip to the grocery store without a child in tow. I'm not saying that any of this is a bad thing, just that we do all of it usually without complaint. But being a stay at home mom does not create a lifestyle of leisure or boredom.

We learn to live on a smaller financial budget. We feed our kids throughout the day. We have to manage our time to fit in personal time. We are home when our kids are sick or need our emotional support.We clean throughout the day only to sit down at the end of the day with a messy house and dishes STILL in the flipping sink. Beds aren't always made, even when we do try to implement that rule. Kids still get hurt, sick, cry, fight, and put in timeout. Being a stay at home mom is not as "glamorous" as one might think.

However, being a stay at home mom does allow me to watch every moment of my children's development unfold. It does allow me to take in the world at a slower pace because I'm looking at it through my child's eyes for the first time. I get to see the rainbow for the first time all over again, or experience the rush of seeing wild animals or birds. Experience the fear of a spider, monsters in the closet, toy messes in their bedrooms all over again. I get to feel their dependence on me for emotional support. Be there to comfort them when they fall down, and applaud them when they try and when they succeed. I get to raise my children my way.

Now look, I'm not saying that working moms are terrible moms. I'm not saying that two-income families are bad. I'm not saying that at all. But when people say things like "I would go crazy if I were a stay at home mom." OR my favorite "I like the money that I am bringing home it provides my kids with a sense of security." IT DRIVES ME UP THE PROVERBIAL WALL!!!

I would love a dual income. In fact, most SAHMs I know do work while they stay home. They are writers, photographers, bloggers, data analysts, accountants, finance professionals. They sell things like Scentsy, Mary Kay, Pampered Chef in order to supplement their single income life. Don't look down on a mom because she is choosing to stay home instead of working to ensure that they excess spending money. My children do not go without because we live on a single income.

I am a stay at home mom and it has taken me a couple years to be proud of what I do at home. I don't need a working mom to add to my anxiety about my CHOICE to stay home. My life isn't posh or privileged. Next time you go to make a smug comment about how "easy it must be to stay home" think twice, because this is not an easy life. It's hard work, but so worth it!