Kara is the Twenty

As the aftermath is setting in for me about the happenings in Connecticut, China, Oregon, and the other places around the world and in the past that have suffered such horrific experiences, I am heartsick. No, that's not the word. I'm in shock, distraught, in the deepest feelings of despair.

As I easily pay my bills, have good health, a family that loves me, a home to sleep in, my children asleep in their beds upstairs, I realize that this could all be taken from me in one quick breath. A madman, a crazy person, someone who is lost from Jesus, a person that has no sense of morality could whisk this all away from me as if it were a dream state.

My heart aches for those parents in Connecticut that have to bury their children. My daughter, 7 years old, is the face of all those children taken too soon. In our human view. What would be going through my head if I were that mother? What would my heart feel? Would I feel anything? Would I feel too much?

My first grader lays peacefully and safely in her bed. And she is alive. Twenty aren't.
I will make my first grader cinnamon rolls with fruit salad for breakfast tomorrow. Twenty moms won't.
My first grader still has a future that is bright. Twenty do not.
My first grader will attend school tomorrow (even if in our home). Twenty won't.

My grief for these mothers that have to bury their children is encompassing. I can't even put it to words. As a parent, you learn what your parents feared. And only a parent can fear these demons that our world has possessed and created as a parent can. Our children are the future. When a child is taken prematurely, it sends unrecognizable shock waves through a time.

Twenty children will not date, celebrate their first kiss, graduate high school, vote for president, drive a car, get married, have children, and experience these fears that their parents fear.

Kara is the face of all those children. I can't look at their pictures because her face appears in their place.

I try to be religious about this situation. Spread the good news. But my heart is broken for these parents and families that will experience an immense amount of sorrow just days before we celebrate the birth of our King. I pray, that in their darkest moments of weakness, God shows them their worth and purpose in surviving such a travesty. I pray, we as a nation band together and demand a higher moral compass for our society.

To the families in Connecticut, and others around the world affected by such travesty, my deepest condolences.