I was watching "Dateline" last night and it was a repeat, but the point of the show was to observe children in a mostly natural environment to see how they would react to things such as bullies and strangers at the door. There was another part to it about teens getting into a car with someone they think has been drinking, but I didn't watch that part.
Some of what I saw made me think about how I'm teaching my kids to respond to bullying and/or strangers. Kara is to the point in her life where she wants to answer the door and phone. Most of the time it isn't a big deal. But there are moments when we are home and I'm not near the front door that she bolts to the door to open it for whomever is knocking. This is what scares me. Teaching children about "stranger danger" doesn't just apply to when they are at school, park, friends houses, or stores. This directly effects ,and most importantly, the safe haven of your home.
One would think that if someone is knocking at your door they would not have ill intentions, but in this day and age, that is just not true. Granted most in home burglaries or kidnappings are not random, but it's scary nonetheless.
So anyway, I was saying to my self "Self, you really should hone in on education about door knocks." In all seriousness, repetition about what is expected and hoped for is the key to success about opening the door to a knock. Aaron even wants to stage a practice for Kara, to encourage her to make the right choice, no matter who is at the door. It is hard to not open the door for people who claim to be police, firemen, etc., but teaching your children to call the 911 operator to verify the emergency worker would help in this situation. It's not wrong!!!
Bullying is a completely different circumstance. I believe that I have taught Kara, and I'm now in the process of teaching Mason, to be kind to everyone. To accept everyone for who and what they are and that in no circumstances is it Okay to be mean to anyone. I asked her this morning what she should do if she witnesses "Joe" being mean to "Bart" (imaginary people to only entice the moral behavior I'm seeking and not making it personal to her) She said she should tell a grown up .. good response. Then she asked me who Joe and Bart were. LOL
So then I "princessed" it up for her about Rapunzel and Cinderella. A second response enticed her to say that it's not okay for Rapunzel to be mean to Cinderella, and that she would never be mean to Cinderella cause she's a pretty princess! HAHAHA
So I took to a personal level with her at her school, since this is a place where most bullying takes place. According to the report on Dateline last night 85% of a student population are witness bystanders. These are the most powerful people in a circumstance of bullying. They have the power to step in and befriend, distract, or tell a teacher. But the sad part is, most don't. I asked her if "George" was being mean to "Dave" (names have been changed from the students' real names) what should she do? She said to tell George to stop being mean and if it didn't stop and/or got worse to tell Miss Jess. I asked her should she play with Dave? She said yes that would make him happy.
At 5 years old Kara is already, unknown to her, aware of acceptable and unacceptable behaviors. I am proud of her and hope that I can repeat the education with my boy. He's a storm to be calmed. =) I hope that parents learn that education about bullying and strangers needs to begin LONG before children are ever in a situation where they would need that knowledge. Kindergarten is the wrong time to teach about bullying. It needs to begin when your child starts playing and socializing with other children.
Peace.
So true! Well-written post. Thanks for sharing! I think I have a little work to do. Eliza let me know that her friend bonked her head but then also mentioned that she shoved her out of the way. Nice.
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